A journey has ended - at least for the time being. And it has to take an opportunity like this to put my foot down. We will suppose to have our monthly Toastmasters chapter meeting this Friday. Now, I know earlier that my IPP (Immediate Past President) would have problem attending. Never in my world, will I to imagine that my President could email me this morning saying he couldn't make it either.
Now, that would clearly throw the club into a crisis. For one, we would then be short of appointment holders for the meeting. Secondly, I can't do this alone, I know immediately. Funny thing is that, I felt to a certain extent of being left in the gutter to rot and die alone - pardon my language. Oh man, the things I say to get out of difficult situation: I reverted back that I wouldn't be able to attend, due to a last minute re-scheduling of evening class.
All this time, my beloved, "sexily balding President" was blind to the fact that we don't have enough strength to cover his absence even though I had sent him a draft programme sheet earlier. Plus, I was already holding two appointments then. Okay, I admit, having to give the opening and closing address also gives me cold feet, which is only natural for someone with my experience. But seriously, I have been very busy for the past few months, primarily with studies, then with work. At times, I felt like breaking down. I knew I don't need this.
I have not watched a movie for a while now and have been considering taking a break from Toastmastering for the longest time. What held me back was the fact that the club is truly short of members, and fresh blood. There is also the bonding I feel for the club, other than believing strongly in giving something back to it; after all, I have benefited greatly in my personal development both as a person and a public speaker. I was like a dejected man all out of love, who, feeling obligated, refuses to ditch his other significant half, as he can't bear to spit out the words of separation. Without doubt, I still love public speaking, but I value my studies more. At this point, I suspect Mr. President thinks that I wouldn't be able to attend the meetings from this month onwards, which suits me fine. On the other hand, I can always come back to it later...